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He took part in a school boy fight. Police arrested him for fighting and expected the director to assign overall responsibility to him. The director of school handled the situation without talking with Asek. He was kicked out of school. His young adult pride was shamed before Nurisa and had to transfer to another school without telling anyone. He finished the school and went to the city. When she knew the situation she was so overwhelmed with emotion that she couldn’t utter a single word.
– Ah, childhood, so simple a thing settled our destiny, – said with sorrowful pain in her soul.
An unimportant thing separated them for 31 years, that’s a pity. If she knew it before she would take it all back. After talking with Asek she couldn’t keep hiding her old feelings. It is very hard to not have a person whom you love very much, if you felt tenderness with him for a while. It is so hard, the flame burnt forever.
They met in a white snowy winter day. Their pure love, like winter’s nature, will be remembered in their hearts forever. It is true that to the world you may be anyone, but to anyone, you may be the whole world. The trees were dusted with white snow, and it was pleasantly snowing. The snowfall was very beautiful in the shadow of a lantern and seemed to shine extraordinarily bright to Nuriza. Looking around she searched for an outline. Asek had already come to the arranged place, and was waiting for her. She didn’t recognize him immediately. The dark, tall, handsome guy had changed during those years. Nuriza came up to him and silently shook hands. He didn’t press her hand like the first meeting. Shaking her hand very softly, he showed the place to sit. Unlike Asek, Nurisa was patient. Like a guilty person Asek became nervous, putting paper on the bench. Nuriza sat carefully on the corner of the chair. No childish manners for either of them.
– Many years ago I was so eager to see you. Time was prolonged, it seemed to me endless. Now, even with no words said, they were talking with their eyes. I am to choose between an unlimited life without you or a short life with you. I have decided to choose only one moment with you. That is the moment right now. I was longing to see you. Life without you seemed so long from sunrise to sunset walking on foot from North to South. My portion of life passed without you. My days were so sad, and boring, full of regret for not saying good bye and missing you in my heart. But it is my destiny. I am glad for my destiny, what I have now. I am deeply happy as I have a lovely husband and children that are meaningful to my life. But, if we were together, our lives will be more luscious! Said Asek, destroying the silence.
She continued her words after several moments:
-You think it was easy for me? Everything was unclear. It seemed that I was a person in the darkness holding a flash light in order to find a way. I remembered your look by heart. What had I done to deserve it? I broke my wing. I hoped and said he loves me, he will come back for me. Missing someone is hopeless blind waiting.
I waited for you but you did not come, I thought that you did not love me, it agonized me. Listen to me, how my days passed.
Transforming into a tree with withered leaves.
A beech falling into hardship,
Not from you but I wondered myself.
I took courage piece by piece again.
(This written stamp on yellow paper, was given to him. (?))
Life did not end at that point. I collected all the remnants of my soul, and found happiness in another way. Now, I am a good wife, a lovely mother to my children, and keep the family’s hearth as a housewife. Never meeting you, then years later meeting and knowing answers – dropping the load is easier, maybe it is my victory.
Asek kept silent.
A feeling of dullness was deep down in their eyes. The beauty of snow falling, gave brightness to the brief meeting.
“Let’s go a little bit”- said Asek, he didn’t want to let Nuriza go, having found the precious stone. Remaining feelings from childhood sought each others’ eyes.
Nuriza understood human nature.
“Let’s go home, children are waiting. It makes no sense”- she said.
The words said, they agreed, they would go two ways. It was impossible to say regrets thought Nuriza because she didn’t marry in her village, grew up in another condition in a completely different way that also brought a lot of difficulty to her life. Now her life is quiet and cloud blown. All her thoughts about Asek, to talk with him is a great pleasure, she needs his inspiration, becoming the goal of life. Talking to anyone about this communication to some extent was wrong. Women must be smart. After long and deep thinking she made the right decision. In one calm conversation:
-Asek, let’s not talk further of our relationship, we might be worst than now.
-Nuriza, listen to me. We wasted too many years. Better late than never. It is never too late to be together. We need time to think of all of it.
-No Asek, we aren’t schoolchildren as thirty-one years ago.
-So then, let’s not live-said Asek. His answer shocked Nuriza.
-How can it be? We both know well that we cannot be together, we both know that our roads will not meet again. It will be selfish if we put our feelings first. It is time to resolve by thinking with the head not the heart. We have the most important thing in our lives, our families. Won’t it be a betrayal before our spouses? I also would like everything to be changed but putting up with our destiny-is the right way. Maybe there is a reason for not being spouses to each other. I heard that a wise man has sincerity in love with people in order to maintain pure mutual feelings forever not destined to be together. There is the infraction in the word “if”. Despite this, the best gift of fate after a few years is to meet your childhood love and realize the power of love and how much we are dear to each other. I think you will support my thought. So let’s say goodbye to each other with good wishes. Let our relationship to be continued as good friends. Let’s continue our happy lives. You are one of my known happiness. At least, Asek agreed to Nuriza’s suggestion reluctantly.
-Nuriza, never forget. I have been loving you so many years and now too. How should I hide my love from you if I cannot hide it from God? Goodbye my pure love…the connection was disconnected.